Q: How many doctors does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Three. One to find a bulb specialist, one to find a bulb installation specialist, and one to bill it all to Medicare.
Q: How many Psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Only one, but the bulb has got to really WANT to change.
Q: How many dentists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Just one, but the soonest he can do it is in two months.
Q: How many people from New Jersey does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Three. One to change the light bulb, one to be a witness, and the third to shoot the witness.
Q: How many graduate students does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Only one, but it may take upwards of five years for him to get it done.
Q: How many Christians does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Three, but they're really only one.
Q: How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: How many can you afford?
Q: How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?
A: The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
Q: How many `Real Men' does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None: `Real Men' aren't afraid of the dark.
The real question is “how many Doctor’s appointments” does it take to diagnose cancer? So far the tally is 13 not counting the five days I spent in the hospital following my pleurodesis.
July, Visit with Primary Care Physician (PCP) about pain in my side. He concludes without examination that I had bruised a rib which would soon heal.
September 13, Visit with my PCP. Complained again about the pain in my side and shortness of breath. PCP suggests a blood test and echo cardiogram of my heart.
September 15, Had the echo cardiogram at American Fork Hospital.
September 16, Follow up visit with my PCP. The echo cardiogram had found fluid around my heart. Doctor orders a chest x-ray and lung capacity test.
September 20, Chest x-ray at American Fork Hospital. The x-ray shows substantial fluid build-up in my right lung cavity. PCP orders a thoracentese to drain the fluid.
September 23, Met again with PCP. He suggests a meeting with a lung, throat, heart specialist.
September 24, TB test at PCP.
September 28, Met with heart, lung, and throat specialist, Dr. Dane who orders a PET scan and schedules surgery for the upcoming Friday.
Sept 29, Pre surgery preparation and PET scan at Utah Valley Hospital.
October 1, Met again with Dr. Dane. The PET scan shows strong evidence of advanced cancer. Have pleurodesis surgery and remain in the hospital until October 6th. On the 6th the Pathologist gives his report that the cancer is advanced, aggressive, has metastasized and is incurable.
October 14, Brain CT Scan at American Fork Hospital checking to see if the cancer has spread to the brain.
October 18, Will meet this Monday with the Oncologist to discuss pathological and brain scan findings and possible treatment options.
October 19, Will meet with lung, throat, and heart specialist as a follow up to the pleurodesis surgery.
1 comments:
This made me laugh. Although my cancer was "the cancer to have" and very curable, I can relate, the amount of doctors/specialist visits is ridiculous. Also great point on the previous post. I wish I had heard that prior to getting cancer as now life insurance for me is very expensive.
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